This is going to be a hard one. I want to start by saying that I do not claim to know everything about this subject. Only my wife and the Lord knows what has gone on in my heart the last couple of years. Like a lot of you, I came from a divorced family. I had no idea how a man was supposed to treat his wife. I thought if I would get up and go to work and then come straight home after work, say hello to the wife, rub the kids heads, then retire into the faithful recliner for the evening, everything would just fly on by.
We do not live in the "Leave it to Beaver" era. Life is so fast we are caught up in the world and needing approval from everyone and everything except from the one that is really doing the judging, the Lord our savior.
In my marriage I have done or tried to do about everything a person shouldn't do in a marriage. I have lied, stole, mentally abused, misplaced trust on where I was and what I was doing, and had a relationship with another woman, and totally manipulated everything.
Wow, that is even worse when you put all of that in front of you. I have talked to enough guys that would say that in their marriages they have felt or done some of those things.The question is why? Why are there so many men in today's world that are feeling these things?
I think it has everything to do with their relationship with their Father. I didn't say dads. Why? Because your Dad will let you down. He is not perfect...but your Father in heaven is always there and His love is never failing. He calls the church His bride. If the people would take care of the church the way we are supposed to then it would be easier to see the love that He has for her.
In my marriage I have been given a second chance to do it right through God's grace and mercy. I know there are some things that I left out that I have done in our marriage but those are the things that I could think of. Besides, it only takes one of those things to start a downward spiral in your marriage.
I have learned it does not matter who, why, or what the argument is about, it is up to us men to love and show our wives the love that our Lord displays for the church and to us.
I am convinced that if we (men) act in the way God has designed us to then we will have the marriage that we wanted the day we said I DO.
Which brings me to my next question when you said I do did you mean "I do" or "I kinda do" or did you think you where still in the repeat after me mode?
It is important to take a look at what happened that day you said this is the happiest day in my life and ask yourself where things went wrong. Why do I not still have that feeling I did on that day? Then I would challenge you to take a look at where you are in your walk with Christ and are you walking together or are you going solo or are you even walking with him at all?
I would also ask that you ask your wife "what can I pray for you, what need are you needing met in your life and will you pray with me on my knees". Then you will see the blessing come up on your lives in a totally new way.
My heart hurts for today's marriages. There are so many men and women that are in trouble spiritually and emotionally. These things can only be healed through the blood of Jesus Christ.
Final thought - always tell her you love her even if its only been 5 minutes since you last said it and when you feel you have got something to say to your wife, make sure you can back it up biblically and that you bring your discussion with a clear and loving heart.
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2 comments:
Wow, that is powerful. Great post and great testimony. Jesus said that if we lust after a woman in our hearts, we've already committed adultery with her. How many men and women are really guilty, then? Most? As you said, thank GOD for the blood of Jesus that covers us.
Baby, I love you. I am proud of you. I am thankful for Jesus. Enough said!
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